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by Jeffrey T. Brownstein, 3/2/07
See the kid in the candy store? That's you. You can have anything you want! That's the 'attraction' of leveraging the power of Law of Attraction. But what happens when you're not entirely sure what you want? Or maybe you do know what you want - and you get it - only to discover it wasn't really what you wanted in the first place. With "The Universe as your catalogue" (Joe Vitale, 'The Secret'), the choices are endless - which is awesome - but with so much to pick from, you can be left feeling more overwhelmed and confused than when you started.
Most of my coaching clients begin their journeys seeking things such as more money, a better job, better health, an intimate relationship, etc. All good, yet it's important to note that these are external goals. What I've found is people often have to dig deeper to uncover what they really want. Without this level of introspection, even the achievement of these results won't guarantee the lasting satisfaction desired.
So here's a powerfully simple exercise (free coaching alert!) you can use on a daily basis. Ask yourself what it is you want (for this example, we'll use 'more money'). Now ask yourself how having more money will make you feel (again, for this example, let's say you'll feel 'freedom' once you achieve your financial goal). So here's the kicker - it isn't more money you really want. It's freedom.
Allow that to sink in for a moment. Can you see how you might actually have your sights set on the wrong targets? Keep in mind, we live in a 'feeling' world. Having more/better anything won't do an iota of good if it isn't making us feel better in some way. So the real question to ask yourself is, 'What feelings do you most desire?' This shift alone - from the external to the internal - will start you on a path to more genuine fulfillment.
In a material-based society, it's easy to misinterpret the rules of the game. For many, it comes down to 'whoever has the most wins'. For others, it may not be as cut-and-dried, yet they still operate from a position of lack (i.e. once they acquire what's been 'missing', their life will finally be in proper alignment). Regrettably, these people have lost touch with the most important truths of all: You already have everything you need. And you can invent any outcome you desire.
So the challenge is to ask yourself, 'What do I want my life to be about?' And if the answer is something like, 'happiness, connection, fulfillment, peace' (fill in your own words), you don't need anything to happen before you can have these. That's because they're feelings, and nothing on the outside is going to materialize such conditions for you. You have to generate them from within. And you have the power to do that right now, in this very moment!
I was going to ask, 'So when will you start?' But it just dawned on me, there's nothing to start. All you need to do is feel. So the more appropriate question is, 'When will you feel happiness, connection, etc?' If you find yourself beginning to answer with 'When such-and-such happens', it's a misguided answer - take a moment, and think about it again.
There is nothing important outside yourself you don't already possess. As The Good Witch of the North said to Dorothy, you always knew how to get home. Personally, I find myself thinking back to the childhood nursery rhyme, 'Row, Row, Row Your Boat'. I'm very fond of the final line - 'Life Is But A Dream'. Because it is. Just a dream. A game. So what game are you going to play? What exactly do you want in your world? And a better question, what's stopping you from having that right now?
Until next time...
With love,
-Jeff
Ask Coach Jeff...
I've been reading a book on The Law of Attraction, and I have a question: I live near Seattle, where the roads can be crowded at times. Yet when I drive, I always create the ride to be easy, smooth, and flowing. And it is! This weekend though, I'm taking a road trip with a friend, who frequently complains about traffic, the freeways being crowded, etc. From what I'm reading, no one else can have an effect on my reality. So tell me, whose world will show up this weekend, mine or his?
-N.N., Sammamish, WA
First of all, you are accurate, no one can affect your reality. As for whose world will show up when you're in the car together - the answer is both. It's like two people attending a concert. One thinks it was awesome, the other doesn't think it was any good. Same concert, two interpretations - two different worlds really. We need to remember that we're constantly creating our own realities. Most people (perhaps your friend?) function under the premise that things happen outside of themselves - so they end up reacting to much of what transpires in their lives, giving up their power and creative control. You specifically used the word 'create' in how the roads show up for you. Well, your friend is also creating, even if he isn't doing it as consciously as you are. And since you're both creating in two distinctly different realities, it's no surprise two radically different sets of results can materialize. Bottom line: if you create a pleasant road trip, that's what you'll get - even if he doesn't experience the same. And with that, I guess I'll end with 'Enjoy the ride'!
-JTB
Send your questions to jeff@lifescaper.com
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